My greatest achievement to date

AT LAST! I wasn't sure that it would ever happen, I've been working on it for so long. But today, just a few moments ago, I did it. I achieved that which so many others try and fail to do for a lifetime. They must pass from this world to the next without knowing the feeling of the wind of such great success because it is so rare, so delicate, so fleeting. It is sad. But I -- *I* -- now glide upon that wind with the grace and majesty and cuteness of a goldfinch.

Perhaps it was partially luck -- being in the right place at the right time, like catching glimpse of a shooting star. But I can say for certain that one does not get to this point without gallons of blood, sweat and tears. It takes dedication and sacrifice. It takes motivation and focus. It takes a refined balance of brain, brawn, beauty and wit. And today the world will know that I, Sarah Christine Schodroski Ehman, have all of that -- and more.

For *I* am now the Bomb Shizzle.